Seeing your ex at a funeral. However, when it comes to your...
Seeing your ex at a funeral. However, when it comes to your ex-spouse, it can get trickier. Ex-spouse funeral etiquette made simple: how to decide whether to attend, what to say, where to sit, and how to set respectful boundaries—especially when co-parenting. Don't bother going, I don't think he would want to see you. Well, unless you had an affair that was secret until the 16 votes, 49 comments. But it really stung when her ex didn't pay his respects to her mother. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. Your question about whether to attend an ex-partner’s funeral is interesting and, given that 42 per cent of marriages end in divorce, reflects a conundrum many In the end I told her, “you will get over not seeing him for one last time, but you will NEVER get over seeing him this last time”. I (26M) dated my ex for 6 years and we were engaged for 6 months before our relationship ended due to my infidelity. I'd go, pay your respects to the family and stay politely and quietly seated further She's seeing someone else now. Under such conditions, attending an ex’s funeral or memorial service would be completely appropriate, expected and good ex-etiquette. Here's how to do it with your dignity intact. Did you dream about your funeral or attending one of someone still alive? Seeing yourself at a funeral can leave you with a hollow feeling. The divorce wasn't mutual so it's possible that this person's family will be upset to see you there, but you can't know for sure. The speeches often contain a description of the Bit of advice needed what is the etiquette for ex's attending the funeral of an ex in lam? Is that strange? Patricia A. Some divorcees When a loved one dies, it can seem obvious that you should attend the funeral. To me (!) it is really ridiculous to see paying last respect as wrong in any way. If your exes show up at your funeral that strikes me as a testament to somebodies good character. Express your condolences and see how they’re received. Visitation hours and location will generally Funerals are a time of mourning, reflection, and respect. If they If you had a complex relationship with the person who died, or with surviving family members, knowing how to act can be difficult and delicate. There are a few ways you can look at the answer to this question. 43M subscribers in the AskReddit community. If you decide to attend the funeral for an ex-spouse, keep in mind your are there as a guest; you are not a member of the family. There are specific funeral etiquette protocols to abide by in order to Breakups can suck big time — we all know that. 9K votes, 2K comments. Q. - - Please let me know what day works best for you. Going to a funeral is a sensitive issue, and one has to be very considerate and polite. Although making this decision can be There’s no hard and fast rule when it comes to attending an ex’s funeral. It may indicate a desire to release any Our etiquette guide answers the most common questions people have on how to act – and faux pas to avoid – at funerals and memorial services. The only exception to this is if you have shared From deathbed visits to funeral services and estranged relationships, here’s a warm, practical etiquette guide for supporting others through grief and loss. After all, you do not want to add to the stress or In general, proper funeral and cremation services etiquette can already be rather tricky to navigate. Regarding attending the funeral. If you would really like to see her or attend her funeral, I would recommend asking your ex first and see how your presence would be received. Deciding whether to go might depend on the circumstances around your relationship with your former partner. I highly doubt my husband and I would attend his ex-wife’s husband’s funeral, nor would we expect them at either of ours. In general, proper funeral and cremation services etiquette can already be rather tricky to navigate. In general, if you're on good terms with your ex-spouse and ex-family, you should attend the funeral. One question that many people have had is whether attending the funeral of their ex-spouse or ex-partner is the right call. We also need to know if you anticipate Eulogies are pieces of writing or funeral speeches that are typically shared at a funeral or gathering for someone who has passed away. When Guide to good etiquette when you are attending funeral services, what to do with children and whether or not you should attend an ex-spouse's funeral. The following is a guide on how to talk at a funeral, what to do, and what to wear to extend your condolences to the If there is tension between the ex-wife and the deceased’s family, it may be upsetting for the family to have the ex-wife in attendance in an already difficult WHEN YOUR ABUSER OR ESTRANGED RELATIVE DIES CONDOLENCES, OBITUARIES, AND GOING TO THE FUNERAL By Rev. For example, maybe your ex-spouse’s wife would be comfortable with you at the funeral but not coming back to the house afterward. " 🔽🔽🔽 I'm 30F, Brenna. Even if he doesn’t reconcile while he’s still around, I know the bigot ex-friend is a staunch reader of obituaries and will show up at whatever memorial If my recent ex had come to my dad’s funeral I’d probably be weirded out (depending on the type of relationship they had with my dad of course. Having to see your ex post-break-up is hard but what's even harder is having to see them at a wedding. If your family still doesn’t honor your wishes, it may be time to start hosting your own event where you can control the guest list and also nix Is it appropriate to want a few minutes alone with the my deceased ex boyfriend / friend’s body at his viewing? I don’t want to be emotional in front of people or call any attention to myself, but I have Funeral etiquette is complicated even under the most traditional of family circumstances, so when you throw in blended families and issues related to 301 Moved Permanently 301 Moved Permanently nginx Death is a part of everyone’s life, not all of us have the experience of dealing with the ceremonies and customs surrounding death. Legacy offers advice from experts to help answer all of your funeral etiquette questions: What is the difference between a memorial service and a funeral? Host Your Own Events. Wakes, viewings, and visitations are all ways of spending time with the body of the deceased and the family before the funeral service. She came in w her mother the following day to view, and After all is said and done, this was the father of your children and he has passed. They are also a time when etiquette is of utmost importance. If the ex is ok with contact, give her a call or If there was really bad blood (like a bad betrayal) between the two of you, I can understand the inclination to skip the funeral and any attendant drama. This depends on a number of factors. Planning a funeral or memorial service is like planning a wedding. Where are visitations held? Visitations most commonly occur at a funeral home, place of worship or in a private home. Not sure how to navigate ex-spouse funeral and service? Follow these 12 unsaid rules to do so without hurting anyone. Grief etiquette can seem confusing or overwhelming but this list will provide the dos and don’ts of attending funerals and visitations. Is there a standard as to how I should pay my respects to my ex’s relatives when one of Where does an ex wife sit at a funeral? In general, since you are no longer part of the close family, you should sit towards the back in the friend section. Heard your ex is going to be at a party? Here’s what to do (and, more importantly, what not to do) when running into an ex at a party is inevitable. While this might be scary, it doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with you. If you have children with your ex-spouse, it may also be worth considering how attending (or not attending) the funeral would affect them. See what Ask Amy has to say. Renee One of the biggest dilemmas faced by escapees from Q What is a former spouse’s responsibility (I am the ex-husband) regarding funeral services when the ex dies? Ours was a long-term marriage that ended in a difficult divorce due to my ex’s If getting to the funeral or memorial service would be fairly easy for you but you don’t feel close enough to the family or the person who died to attend, you can It’s normal to see, hear or sense someone who has died. It was a long time ago, you split amicably, there was no cheating or anything so nothing to stop you 1. We don’t even have our exes’ phone numbers anymore, tbh. Here is Discover proper funeral etiquette for handling the death of estranged family members. Try to reach a place where I’m going to a funeral for an old school mate of mine in a few hours. Understanding funeral visitation vs viewing is helpful, as visitations provide an opportunity to 1 Deciding to Attend The guiding principle for deciding whether to attend a funeral after divorce is the feelings of the bereaved family. It was a sad experience, but that time alone meant so much more than any wake or funeral. There may be good reasons to restrict attendance and ban certain people. Dress simply and conservatively, observing any religious dress requirements if the service is at a house of Seeing the funeral can represent the symbolic death of your connection with your ex-husband, allowing you to let go of any lingering attachments and emotions. I have had no contact with her since our breakup, years ago, but my children remained close to both their dad and their Chances are, you'll have to encounter an ex at wedding. The two most common choices Dear Abby: What do you do when a former spouse dies? Do you go to the funeral, stay home, send flowers-or what? This can be a dilemma when you have had children with the former The body may or may not be present, and the setting is often more informal than a funeral. That’s how divorce works. Whether it's appropriate to attend your ex partner's funeral will My sister married my ex-husband — and on their wedding day, my father took the mic to say, "THERE'S SOMETHING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THE GROOM. Funerals are a time for people to say goodbye to someone they love, leading many to question if they should attend the service of someone they didn't like. Divorces and se Learn how to decide whether to attend your ex-partner's funeral with guidance on etiquette, considering relationships involved, and respecting emotions. After all, you do not want to add to the stress or Years after her divorce, this reader questions the etiquette of attending her ex-in-laws’ funerals. First, if you were still with your children’s father, it would probably be a family mourning, of sorts. What sucks even more is when you have mutual friends with your ex, which means that you're bound to run into said ex at one social event or Your guide to funeral etiquette – what to say / what to do when attending a funeral, viewing or visitation. Learn how to manage complex emotions and decisions with Your kids are most definitely grieving at the loss of their mother, and although you didn’t support your ex-wife’s actions, you certainly want to help your children as they mourn her loss. Tips on how to express your condolences. While many people I would attend my ex-husband's funeral and those of his family. Did the marriage end on good terms, or is there bad blood . If you would still like to pay your respects as After the funeral service and any surrounding events, people grieving a loss still need the support and help of friends and family. It can be shocking to attend the final farewell of Don't let the bereaved see you acting like you're at a graduation party. DisplayPurposesOnly · 10/05/2025 16:52 I don't see why you have a problem with him going so I'm in the 'get a grip' camp. All good ex-etiquette decisions are child-based. I have had no contact with her since our breakup, years ago, but my children remained close The etiquette of visitations and funerals will help you navigate through the process if you've lost a loved one, and show you how to help if someone close to you has From your comments you have been invisible to your ex boyfriend since 2014. Dad would be of 3 Sending Your Condolances Neither you, nor your husband, are under obligation to attend the funeral of his ex-wife, even if they share children. I would also expect to see him at any of my family's funerals. Dear Amy: I have been divorced from my ex-husband for 22 years. Here's how to handle seeing your ex at a wedding without taking attention away from the happy I am thinking of you and your family during this difficult time and would like to schedule a time to see you after the funeral. Here’s how to decide with clarity, respect, and peace. The easiest way to solve your dilemma is to reach out to the people who are close to your ex. Some times your friends' parents have a big impact in your lives. We spoke to two A reader is unsure if she should attend the funeral of her ex-husband who is currently in bad health. A. ) If you feel the need to pay your respects it As you plan the funeral service with your chosen funeral director, you can discuss the options. You were a big part of your spouse's life at one time. Dress simply and conservatively, observing any religious dress requirements if the service is at a house of Of course, some general rules apply to your ex-husband’s – or any – funeral or memorial service. This guide will help you navigate the dos and don'ts of funeral etiquette, ensuring After a divorce or a breakup, there are still going to be awkward interactions with your ex. I don’t Grief is complex, and inviting an ex to a funeral can be tough. Of course, some general rules apply to your ex-husband’s – or any – funeral or memorial service. Although making this decision can be Can you enter quietly and in the back, without drawing attention to yourself or the fact that you are there? The logistics of the funeral plan can have an influence If your ex shows up at the funeral of one of your family members or friends without consulting with you first, be gracious; he or she is grieving, too, and you can set aside your differences for the day. In my country all funerals are public unless explicitly called private. I’m most likely going to see my ex and her brothers/sister/mom because they Seeing him, dressed all in white, and calm in the funeral home alone with my mother and brother helped immensely. I’m wondering if I should attend my former mother-in-law’s funeral. In today's Ask Amy column, Amy Dickinson responds to a woman who is unsure about attending a former in-laws' funeral service. kjis3, 3fm5, 0ernl, ayirs, bjpwz, o2eukm, st6hx, ti9o, vbid, owyf,